Top Ten LOLs from Yesterday's Eagles Loss to the Giants

1. Bumbling coach Andy Reid made the following idiotic moves: The Eagles had the ball. Third and 1 from the Giants 1-yard line. It was actually more like the one-inch mark. Rather than take another shot sneaking it over the goal line with Michael Vick or sending LeSean McCoy over the top via handoff, he chose to have Vick step about three yards back and hand the ball to seldom-used fullback Owen Schmitt. Schmitt was predictably stonewalled! LOLZ!

2. Early in the fourth quarter, the Eagles have a 16-14 lead. They have the ball at the Giants' 43. It's 4th and 1. The smart move would be to punt and allow the Giants to start deep in their own territory. So of course Reid chooses to hand off to McCoy, who was abruptly swallowed up by the entirety of the Giants' defense. With great field position, the Giants would grab the lead and never relinquish it. BWAHAHAHAAH!

Sorry! Twenty Reasons Why the Eagles Won't Be Winning the Super Bowl This Year!

As of this post, The Pizza Project is not sure about how much Philadelphia Eagles coverage they will have this year. You see, site sports fanatic Saucy McGilliguddy is still in the midst of a boycott due to the team's signing of psychopathic ex-con Michael Vick to call the signals. So enjoy this preview of Philadelphia's football squad and look out for additional articles when "The Sauce Boss" can lower himself to the depths necessary to watch a criminal run around with a pigskin for entertainment purposes.

So now, the twenty reasons the Eagles won't be winning the Super Bowl this year...AGAIN.

Ten Things I'm Hating...RIGHT NOW!!!

1) That guy on the train who flops into the seat like a 300 pounder - Seriously, you couldn't ease your behind onto the leather without making me hop three inches out of my seat? Chill the F out. It's not a trampoline!

2) The lady who gave me the look when I jumped in front of her at the Corner Bakery today - Sorry, lady. They asked for the "next ready guest." Staring at the menu board for ten minutes with your mouth wide open does not exactly communicate the idea of readiness. They have salad, soup, and sandwiches. Pick one and get it over with.

3) People who talk when they are in the bathroom - I don't even like when someone talks to me while I am urinating, but the other day I walked into a bathroom to see two dudes chatting each other up...and one of them was in a stall with his pants around his ankles. Engaging in conversation mid-evacuation is so wrong I'm not sure I could do the reasons justice.

Ten Things I'm Hating...RIGHT NOW!!!

1. The Wind

Right now, I could go for just about anything else. Give me snow in the springtime. A torrential downpour? Why the hell not? Pretty soon, the heat will come and I will complain about that as well. But not as much as I do about the wind. I can't remember the last time I walked outside and it wasn't blowing at least 25 miles per hour. Maybe it just seems like that. But I have very delicate hair. I need this to stop.